What do your parents/children (delete as applicable) think of your job?

My Dad is the coolest person I know. I'm thinking of bringing the “still alive Dad show” to Edinburgh one year. I think he'd support me no matter what I did for a living.

What’s the worst thing about being a comedian?

Being cornered by a self-appointed expert at a gig when you've just died in front of an audience who wanted something else. Then having to listen whilst said expert tells you jokes you can use in your set, which you clearly can't because they are essentially hate crimes. Then trying to get the eye of the promoter who then counts out each bank note loudly, begrudgingly and in front of the entire audience. Thankfully, this has never happened to me. But it's the worst thing I know of. Oh and the travel is a killer.

I think you are very good at what you do (that’s why I’m asking these questions). What do you think of you?

I'll take that. Thankyou. I think I'm good at it too. And I think I'm getting better. Trying to perfect the art form is impossible but it's the journey that matters. Surfers say that every wave is different. To a comic every audience is different. I think I've found what I do now and I'm excited about it. My dialogue with myself (to get all life coach about it) is for the most part, very good.

How much do you earn and how much would you like to earn?

Comedy isn’t about money for me and that's probably for the best. It’s about glory. I want to earn as much glory as possible. If that translates to money then great. This year's show is about closure for me. I can draw a line under something and move on to the next part of my life and career. I still buy lottery tickets and if I win I'll travel in luxury to gigs.

How important is luck in terms of career success – have you had lucky breaks?

If I get something I want comedy is a meritocracy and when I fail it’s a conspiracy. I’ve had all varieties of luck over the years and there’s very little that I haven’t turned into comedy. My biggest break came when I was asked to be an Elf on a Christmas iphone application called Elf Cam. I was told I'd be a millionaire if it sold. (The IF the is the important part of this story) I would get a percentage of sales that were estimated to be in several millions. For some reason, the app didn't prove as popular as I'd hoped. We sold less than 100 world wide. I'm not a millionaire but I do have the worst photo ever of me dressed as an elf.

Alan Davies has said that comedians fall into two categories - golfers and self-harmers. The former just get on with life, the latter are tortured artists. Which are you – or do you think you fit into third category?

Have you seen how tortured golfers are when things don’t go their way? I’m just doing my own thing because I’ve tried to be like everyone else and it just doesn’t work. Like a golfer I just end up screaming at a sea of strangers then go to a bar and tell everyone how unlucky I was. I'm aiming to be in a category of my own!

Who is your favourite person ever and why – not including family or friends or other comedians?

There was a guy who used to play the bins in Cardiff when I lived there. I'm not sure if he was a trained musician but he had a big presence and everyone knew him locally. His name was Ninja and he just did his own thing. Every week he'd be in the city centre drumming to his own tune. He feels like a hero and I don't quite know why. I also don't know why he was called Ninja because he made quite a lot of noise and moved quite slowly.

Do you keep your drawers tidy and if not why not? (please think long and hard about this question, it's to settle an argument with my girlfriend. The future of our relationship could depend on your response).

I'm so glad you asked me this question because in a weird coincidence, I'm talking about this very issue in my show this year. I don't want to spoil it for you. But if you come and see my show, I promise (this is now a contract by the way) that I'll give you the answer you are looking for.

Matt Price’s show ‘As Seen On CCTV’ is at Just The Tonic – The Spare One at 6.20pm from 3rd – 27th August (not 14TH). For tickets go here.

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