What do your parents think of your job?'
They are both extraordinarily proud of me. Which is primarily because I’ve convinced them I’m a successful opthalmologist.
What’s the worst thing about being a comedian?
There are aspects of it that are quite mentally strenuous. Especially remembering to say “waka waka!” after every joke.
I think you are very good at what you do (that’s why I’m asking these questions). What do you think of you?
Would you mind elaborating on how I’m very good at what I do? Maybe in an essay with a 10,000-word minimum?
How much do you earn and how much would you like to earn?
I’d just like to take a moment to applaud the audacity of this question. Whoever wrote it is going places in life.
How important is luck in terms of career success – have you had lucky breaks?
Luck is a huge part of it. I did a show at a casino once, and lost more money at the roulette table than I made from the gig. You’d think that ball would land on ‘00’ at least once.
Alan Davies has said that comedians fall into two categories - golfers and self-harmers. The former just get on with life, the latter are tortured artists. Which are you – or do you think you fit into third category?
If I’m being honest, I probably fit into a third category: self-golfer. By that, I mean I’m the type of comedian who provides incredibly annoying answers to straightforward questions.
Who is your favourite person ever and why – not including family or friends or other comedians?
This guy Clay. He went to my high school. As teenagers at a Cici’s Pizza buffet, I witnessed him eat ten pieces of pizza, ten breadsticks, ten bowls of pasta, ten cinnamon rolls, and ten brownies. And now he’s a father of two.
Do you keep your drawers tidy and if not why not? (please think long and hard about this question, it's to settle an argument with my girlfriend. The future of our relationship could depend on your response).
Absolutely not. Every single drawer of mine, whether it’s kitchen or desk or underwear, is a free-for-all. Pure anarchy in there. It looks like a small explosion went off inside. It takes me three hours to find my checkbook. My wife will leave me any day now.
Shitty Mozart will be at the Gilded Balloon The Patter Hoose – Nip Room @ 11pm for tickets go to www.edfringe.com
PHOTO CREDIT – ALEXANDER TROWBRIDGE AND REED KAVNER
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