6. What do your parents/children (delete as applicable) think of your job?

I seriously don’t think anyone is interested in the answer to this question. Not being rude, but seriously. If you’ve read this far and seriously want to know what my parents think of my job, tweet me @sarahecallaghan

7. What’s the worst thing about being a comedian?

Having to work for up to 20 minutes a day. Nightmare.

8. I think you are very good at what you do (that’s why I’m asking these questions). What do you think of you?

Forget what I said about this interview, I really like it and you and agree with everything you say.

9. How much do you earn and how much would you like to earn?

Forget the last answer, this has gone ridiculous again. 

10. How important is luck in terms of career success – have you had lucky breaks?

Luck is important. I do this thing in my new show 24 about making your own luck, you do that mainly by crow-barring in plugs for your new show and twitter address into interviews.

11. Alan Davies has said that comedians fall into two categories - golfers and self-harmers. The former just get on with life, the latter are tortured artists. Which are you – or do you think you fit into a third category?

I’m a third category, a kind of self-harming golfer. I get on with life, but I’m constantly bashing myself in the face with a 9-iron.  

12. Who is your favourite person ever and why – not including family or friends or other comedians?

Philip Schofield. Silver fox and the only entertainer over 50 currently not in prison. 

13. Do you keep your drawers tidy and if not why not?

Alright we’re done here. This interview? One star. No one has read this far. Guaranteed.