RYAN SAMPSON plays Grumio

What goes through your mind when you know you’re coming back to Rome and slipping into Grumio’s clothes again?

I’m always like, ‘Oh my god, what are they going to do to me this time?! What shit are they going to throw at me?’ We always do a table read and we get to the scene where we’re all walking through town naked and it’s funny on paper but you know it’s a day of hell to film!

Do you also dread the physicality of playing Grumio?

Yeah, there’s a part of me that thinks, ‘Oh no, here we go again!’. I had a massage yesterday just to straighten myself up otherwise I walk round all hunched over. I’m also always worried about my face sticking like Grumio’s does, so I’ve been on YouTube and found a load of old lady exercises you can do for your face to stop it stiffening. I don’t want to look like Grumio all the time, that would be terrible! Who wants to look like Grumio, or a slightly sad man, for the rest of their life?!

Fans will be surprised to hear Stylax departs…

I know. We do this thing where we really embrace it, there’s a whole episode where Grumio gets really drunk all the time, he’s basically gone to shit. It really works and of course it brings in this new character, Jason, played by Jonathan Pointing.

What was it like losing Joel Fry from the cast?

It’s been really surprising. I thought this series wouldn’t have been as much fun but we’ve had a right laugh! Joel had said before that he might not do another one so we kind of expected it and the great thing has been having Jonathan on board as Jason. He’s been great to have on the show, it’s been a lot of fun as a series.

How does his departure impact the dynamic with Marcus and Grumio?

It’s basically like a reboot to Plebs. And we’re running this shitty little bar which is always failing. We’ve always got new ideas to rejuvenate it, but it’s always a dead loss! 

Are they still Plebs even though they have managed to open a bar?

Oh yeah, absolutely! They are constantly being shat on by life all the time. It’s what works about the show. English people love underdog comedy. I was talking to one of the Bulgarian extras about it and they couldn’t understand why people want to watch a comedy about a bunch of losers, but that’s exactly what we want to watch!

What sort of schemes do they come up with to make the bar successful?

A really good one is when Marcus tries to reinvent the bar as a restaurant, because Grumio is a real foodie he goes on this mission to take charge of it. But he won’t serve pub food, he wants to serve really posh grub.

So he’s the Gordon Ramsay of Rome?!

Well yeah, but Grumio is shit! He’s too ambitious. His big idea is cooking stuff stuffed inside other stuff, but it has to rhyme, so a frog in a dog, or ham in a lamb. I’ve got this scene where I have to stuff all these roasted things inside each other, it was really gross! I had a roasted mouse which I had to stuff inside a grouse.

Can fans expect to see more naked action this series?

Oh it’s so naked this year, that’s the theme of the series! It’s so embarrassing because we only get these pasty little white things to cover our bits. One end has a sticker on it which sticks just above your bum crack and then it goes underneath and has a sack at the front to hide your bits. There’s a scene where there’s all three of us naked walking through town. So we’re all standing there on set looking like weirdos who have just wandered out of a hospital. It’s just horrible! It’s the nightmare that everyone has, you know the one where you turn up to work naked, well, we live that for real! 

So seeing as you were all naked together, did you compare bums?

Oh yeah, when you look at the shot from behind, pardon the pun, it’s quite funny because we all have very different sized bums. It’s really weird, you don’t often get to see three bums in a row. Obviously I’ve got the best bum, but it’s rather miniature, which I’ve never realised before. I always thought I had a normal sized bum in relation to my body, but actually I think it’s even too small for me. I think I’ve got the bum of a small child, an 11-year-old girl’s bum stuck on my body! It’s really weird.

Have there been any funny naked moments?

Well, there’s a scene where we are all given a free session to try out this gym, but because it says session rather than day, we decide that means it’s never ending and try to move in. We’re naked in this plunge pool, which should sound like the best day on set ever, but it was awful! They filled this plunge pool with water from a local hot spring near set. It comes out of the earth just under boiling temperature and they filled this pool. It was full to the brim and there’s no way of getting cold water into it so we just had to get in. It was the hottest water I’ve ever been in! I looked at myself in the mirror afterwards and I looked fucking weird! Half my face was really red and so was my body. It was basically a Plebs soup, or boy gravy! It sounds like I’m being a wanky actor saying the bath was too hot, but it was! 

Has Jonathan, being the newcomer, been nervous about his naked scenes?

Jonathan is so resilient, he doesn’t care about anything! He’s like a machine in every way. Every night we go out and he’s like, ‘Beer lads?’. Four beers later and I’m like, ‘How are you alright?’. I’m 5ft4 so I have to really watch it! Every day he has naked scenes and he just doesn’t care. Like the other day he had to climb down a ladder naked and there’s no way of people not being able to see up your bum hole but he’s absolutely not bothered. 

Did he hit the gym before joining the show?

Nah, not really! He’s like, ‘I did a few press ups last night but to be honest I’m a bit flabby, but never mind!’ He’s not really arsed about any of that.

What’s Jason like?

He’s a thick wannabe ladies’ man but he’s actually crap at everything. He’s a blonde airhead!

Fans may be surprised to see Made In Chelsea’s Ollie Locke making a cameo this series, what was he like?

He was great, such a nice guy. He's really funny. You’d think from what you know of him off TV that he would be difficult but he was just a warm, lovely guy. He plays this hipster in the show who’s too cool for our restaurant, he's very funny. I think people will be surprised by him, he was really good and really on it. We went out and got smashed at this restaurant. We were meant to just go for one glass each but they misunderstood and brought a bottle each! 

Have you had fun with the other lads off set?

The other day we went go-karting, Tom and Jonathan are annoyingly good at it, I got disqualified half way through for ramming everyone. I didn’t know ramming was a thing you’re not allowed to do! I do feel a bit of a dweeb with these two because they are just really good at stuff. Also, me and Jonathan went to a club for Halloween and the first one we went to no one was dressed up, then we went to another one and everyone was dressed up. We weren’t, so we just fashioned outfits out of whatever we could find in the club. Jonathan had leaves stuck to his head and I basically just had coats around my head! 

Is it right someone’s had a real-life tattoo of Grumio on their leg?

Oh my god, yes. This is bizarre. There’s a guy, who funnily enough is called Ryan, who has a really amazing tattoo on his leg of Grumio dancing. It’s not even a picture from the show, he’s had it made, it’s really good. That’s quite a big deal isn’t it? I’m on his skin forever! 

Apparently Grumio also has a real-life doppelgänger…

Yeah, a newspaper did a lookalike of Angela Merkel and put a picture of me as Grumio next to her. She does look a bit like him. She’s just got a bit of a saggy face, hasn’t she? She’s got the weight of the world on her back, no wonder! Put a sack tunic on her and she basically is Grumio. Maybe she could play his mum!?

Finally, would you love to come back for series 5?

It all depends on the fans and whether they like this series! Maybe we’ll end up doing a Last of the Summer Wine and still be going when we’re 65! I’d love to come back.

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