6. What do your parents/children (delete as applicable) think of your job?
My children get annoyed that I'm away most weekends. That I never do Friday Night Movie night. But they also love that my job is to tell jokes and sometimes I get gigs in fun places and they can come along too. Like Leicester.
My parents feel the same way, especially with Friday Night Movie night.
7. What’s the worst thing about being a comedian?
Missing Friday Night Movie night.
8. I think you are very good at what you do (that’s why I’m asking these questions). What do you think of you?
I think Im amazing at what I do, until I have a shit gig then i think I’m awful at what I do, until I have an alright one and then I think, yeah I can get away with this, until I have an amazing one and I think I am amazing, until I have a shit one etc etc etc.
9. How much do you earn and how much would you like to earn?
I earn enough to keep my family happy. By dicking around onstage I have managed to buy a house. That still weirds me out. So my family are happy. I would like to earn enough to make them ecstatic.
10. How important is luck in terms of career success – have you had lucky breaks?
Lucky breaks? I’ve had a few. Unlucky breaks? I’ve had a few. Lunch breaks? I’ve had a few. Reality breaks? I’ve had a few... too many. On one now. Im currently writing this on the back of a fat unicorn. Some say its a rhino, more say “Get off that endangered animal”.
11. Alan Davies has said that comedians fall into two categories - golfers and self-harmers. The former just get on with life, the latter are tortured artists. Which are you – or do you think you fit into a third category? In that analogy I would be a golfer, although I hate golf and playing it feels like self harm.
I liked something Phil Jupitus said years ago in response to the question “Is comedy the new rock n roll?” He said “Proper comedians can't be cool. No matter the cool clothes or the cool hair, you cant hide the big fuck off clown shoes”
12. Who is your favourite person ever and why – not including family or friends or other comedians?
Ryan Reynolds. Funny, good looking, owns a gin company, is Deadpool. Favourite person ever and Nelson Mandela.
13. Do you keep your drawers tidy and if not why not? (please think long and hard about this question, it's to settle an argument with my girlfriend. The future of our relationship could depend on your response).
Bedroom drawers? Mine tend to be over filled with clothing that doesn’t fit, but I don’t want to get rid of, because my hope is that I will fit them again one day. So, are they tidy inside? No. Can I close them? With effort. They look tidy when they are closed though.
One kitchen drawer is an absolute mess and full of shit. Me and my wife don’t talk about that drawer, for that leads to madness.
